Grooming and online predators

Predators and grooming can happen quickly or over time. Predators usually do their due diligence before approaching a target, and before approaching young people online, usually look for 3 x primary themes in behaviour:

1. Risk taking behaviour or language used by the young person.
2. The time of day the young person is online.
3. Any publicly available information they can use to create connection with the young person.

Watch the video below to learn more about the importance of online safety. Replace first video below with animated clip.

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In the video below you can turn on closed captions and change the playback speed if you would like to watch the clip slower or faster.

What key elements of this scenario do you see that may be red flags?

• Vulnerability: Jonah is vulnerable due to both his communication limitations and disability, as well as their LGBTIQ status.
• Apathy about personal information about Jonah’s interests previously being shared on public forums.
• Encouraging rule breaking: Jonah is going online late at night and Ask encourages this.
• Encourages secrets – Ash tells Jonah he won’t tell anyone if he’s online at night.
• First approach: Jonah was approached in a private group by a stranger, he didn’t reach out first.
• Quickly establishes trust: Ash has shown a quick ability to form a tight bond with Jonah.
• Isolation: Ash is potentially creating division between Jonah and their family, cutting them off.

How would you approach Jonah about Asher?

• Where do you think unsafe strangers are online?
• How might an unsafe stranger make you feel? Surprise them that unsafe strangers can also make people feel really good at first.
• Asher sounds cool. Can you show me his profile online? Check Connections and contacts for real world friendships or links.
• It’s a cool coincidence that Asher has the same figurines from The Elder Scrolls too. Has he posted about the same dragon like you did on Facebook? Can you show me what he likes to post about? Look for evidence of basis of connection or common ground

When facing resistance

• It’s important to let your child know that not all strangers are bad online, however we all have to take measures to protect ourselves.
• Try to stay calm yourself and avoid getting angry or critical
• Tell them while you respect they may want independence and privacy, you also need to keep them safe and that is important as well
• Reassure your child they are not in trouble and that your family is always there to help
• Ask your child what they think would be the best solution for you both to find a middle ground between fun and safety.
• Reassure them to always talk to you or a trusted adult for help when you need it and no matter what the circumstances